Vindictive | Chapter 12

A tall investigator named Lawrence and probably in his mid-thirties slides my original tag across the table towards me. It stops right at the edge of my side of the table and I stare at it apathetically, not even bothering picking it up. If I did, it will only make me obvious. He crosses his arms on the table and looks intently into my eyes.

“Tell me, Cato, is that yours?” He asks scrutinizing me in a highly browbeating way.

I take a quick look at the tag in front of me again and for a moment, I feel a longing in my heart. The tag I have on me suddenly feels so heavy, like it’s not supposed to be there. I should be wearing the original, the one my parents gave to me as a present for my sixth birthday. I’m glad that my mom already gave it to me before my birthday even came because if she didn’t, I don’t think I’ll be looking at it now.

What once gave me happiness and bittersweet memories will also be the one accessory that will lead me to my misery.

I shake my head innocently. “No, that’s not mine. I haven’t even seen that before.” I answer as fast and straightly as I could, not wanting to choke on my own lie.

Lawrence keeps his eyes on me as if hoping that I will break soon enough. I really want to laugh because no matter how long they keep me here at the station, I will never voice out the truth. I will never turn myself in. Unless they start using a lie detector during my interrogation, only then will I be doomed.

I just wish they were stupid enough to not think about that.

“Are you sure?” The investigator asks.

“I am a hundred percent sure.”

He sighs before looking down at the files he has in his hands. He flips a page over and speaks. “It says here that you were at Ms. Belvill’s house the day that she was killed. What were you doing there?”

“I was visiting. Glimmer was blabbering about her new combat room at school and I guess she made it so intriguing that I have to check it out.” That one is actually true.

Lawrence nods his head as if he’s actually considering my answer. If I know, he’s still doubtful.

“Cato, we have a tape submitted by an anonymous source. The film is from the night Ms. Belvill was murdered and I want you to watch it closely.” Lawrence informs me. “Tell me what you think after you see it.”

He reaches for the remote control on the small table behind him and turns on the television located at the right side of the cubical room. The beats of my heart quickens as the screen showed the surveillance tape at the combat room the night I accidentally killed Glimmer.

I guess even though Fox made a faux appearance that nothing out of the ordinary is happening that night; the cameras still filmed the real situation.

Suddenly, two figures come on the camera’s view: Rue and I. She throws the duffel bag at me and I observe the film and the investigator at the same time as the video shows myself loading the bag with various weapons. Then Rue comes running up to my side and I hold up the pistol, ready to take my shot. Glimmer comes into view and I watch myself pull the trigger and her body falls lifelessly on the floor.

The film is too much for me to handle. The temptation to lower my head is overwhelming me because I don’t want to relive that night. But I can’t do that. I need to keep watching to further visualize my innocence.

After three more torturous minutes, the surveillance video is finally over and Lawrence switches the television off.

Well, I was right about one thing—Glimmer's body is actually out of the camera’s vision. I try not to look nervous but sitting there at the tiny room with a very suspicious investigator, I witness everything unfold in front of my very eyes. I realize there really is something more to that night other than Glimmer's murder.

Lawrence swivels his rolling office chair to face me and once again rests his elbows on the aluminum table. “What do you think about that video, Cato?”

“Two stupid teenagers trying to rob an innocent girl’s house and accidentally kills her.” I state, intertwining my own fingers together.

“Could it be that the Cato in the video is also the same Cato I’m talking to right now or it’s just plain coincidence?” Lawrence utters with such authority in his voice.

Shit. Rue was heard stating my name in the video and it’s one of our mistakes that night. But I need to resume my innocent act so I decide to try to mislead the investigator.

“Are you really that stupid? Just because one of the robbers in that video has the same name as I am, you’ll just assume that it’s me? What if it’s not? I’m not the only Cato in this world, you know.” I defend though I’m supporting the wrong side.

“I could ask you the same thing.” Lawrence leans forward. “Are you really that stupid to think that the police and the investigators finally gave up on this case? Aren’t you wondering what we’ve been doing these past few days?”

“No.” Keeping a blank face, I answer plainly.

Lawrence breathes out a frustrated sigh. “For no one’s sake, I’d tell you anyway. My team and I had been going around the Capitol interrogating every Cato that resides in this city. None of them claimed the tag is theirs.”

“So?”

“You’re the only Cato left, Hadley.” Lawrence hisses through gritted teeth. 

I’m mentally smirking to myself because I’m proud that I’m giving this brainless man a hard time. I know he’s held tough cases before and I’ll make sure I’ll be his hardest and most hardheaded yet.

“Have you checked the Districts outside the Capitol?” I inquire. Widening my eyes, I playfully place my hand on my heart. “Oh, I’m sorry. Are you not aware of those places? Shame on you.”

Lawrence slams his hand on the table in frustration. “You’re not making this easy, Hadley.” He notifies me.

I scoff. “You’re one to talk. I’ve been lending you the most honest answers I can give you and you’re making this more complicated. I suggest you let me go now because I have some business to do.”

“What business?” He questions curiously.

“I’m a seventeen-year-old guy. I need money therefore, I have to get a job.” I answer him with utter disbelief. Pushing my chair away as I stand, I head to the door. I’ve had enough of this stupid interrogation.

“Where are you going?” Lawrence asks.

I ignore him as I open the door and step out. I hear him scrambling to his feet to follow me.

“Hadley, get back here!” Lawrence yells. When I don’t provide him with an answer one more time, he goes choleric. “We’re not done with this yet! I’ll keep an eye on you, Cato. Mark my words!”

“Will do, sir.” I twirl around to face him as I start to walk to the exit backwards. “Oh wait! What shade of highlighter do you prefer? Pink? Blue? Green? What?” I mock him, which only satisfies me when I hear a few workers chuckling at my statement while the others are holding Lawrence back due to his newfound hunger to strangle me.

“You better watch your back, Hadley!” He bellows when I finally reach the door and had turned my back on him.

Without looking back at one enraged investigator, I raise my right hand up and flash him the finger.

 * * *

Monday rolls around and the moment I unload Finnick's car (he insists to drive me to school since it’s on the way to his office anyway), Glimmer's radiant smiling face welcomes me. Her massive portrait is placed at the lobby of the school where everyone can see. Beside her picture is a large piece of paper, which is already full of dedications for the defunct vivacious girl.

Hoisting my bag on one shoulder, I walk towards it to read maybe a few messages written for her. The first thing that my eyes searched for is Clove's message. A minute later, I realized finding it is like searching for a needle in a haystack so I give up. I end up reading a dedication by a boy named Spencer instead. Apparently, he is a geek that used to be Glimmer's sophomore year chemistry lab partner who still believes it was fate that brought them together.

I chuckle at the note before deciding that the others will contain the same message and take my daily route to my locker.

* * *

Lucky for me, the day went by fast today. I couldn’t be happier that it is finally over as I exit my last period’s classroom and stride down the hallway to my locker.

I haven’t seen Clove today at school. Annie said she attended but she wasn’t there during Physics. She probably skipped it knowing we share that class together. Not to mention, we’re also seat mates.

By the time I reach the hallway where my locker is, most of the pupils had already filed out of the school building leaving at least five to seven students in the hallway. I quicken my pace when I spot the girl I’ve wanted to see standing in front of her locker. I resist the urge to grab her attention because if I do so, she may run away and I’ve lost my chance to talk to her again.

I get to my locker and lean on it, making sure to create enough noise for Clove to notice me.

A smile unconsciously forms on my lips when she makes eye contact with me. Although she immediately looks away, at least she didn’t run.

“Hi.” I breathe out as I’m panting. “Remember me? We used to be friends.”

“Key word: used to be.” Clove mumbles as she shoves a notebook inside her locker.

I sigh in relief knowing that she still bothers to speak to me. Maybe Clove really does care for me after all.

I follow her as she pushes the school’s double doors and ventures out to the almost spotless parking lot.

“Come on, Clove. Just hear me out.” I beg, trying but failing miserably to catch her swinging arm. “Please, I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry?” She snaps, twirling around to look at me. “That’s cool. Go write a book about it and let someone who actually cares read it.”

“Clove.” I say. “You don’t know how it feels like when you ignore me. You made me feel special and then suddenly, you left me hanging. I just feel so paranoid, all day I’d be thinking what if I can turn back the time and done a completely different thing?”

When she doesn’t say a reply, I reach for her arm and grab it to keep her from walking away. “Just let me apologize. It’s a whole lot easier than arguing.”

“There are some things that cannot be changed and there are some situations where an apology won’t be able to change a thing.” She says not giving me even just a single quick glance over her shoulder.

“Clove…”

“This wasn’t supposed to hurt so much, you know?” She turns around once again. Her eyes suddenly wandering around my face as if she’s not been able to look at it for a long time and trying to capture everything that looks familiar and detecting what has changed. “But it hurts, Cato. It hurts because people did what they did to you because you gave them too much freedom.”

“I didn’t mean to do that to you. I know that you think I’m only using you but I’m not, Clove. I can’t even bear to think of myself using you. You deserve better than that.” I say.

Half of what I said is true. Yes, at first I was only befriending Clove so that I can use her against Brutus. But as time goes by and the more I spend time with her, I realize maybe she’s not that bad. Maybe she’s just putting up that cavalier demeanor because she barely knows me and wanted to look tough. The more I see of Clove, the more I want to protect her. Suddenly, I don’t want to have my revenge on Brutus using his daughter anymore. Instead, I want her to stay out of this and just have everything revolve around Brutus and I.

My vengeful desire melts into one of a want to protect Clove.

She wiggles her arm to break free from my strong grip. My eyes gravitate downwards and I have to let go as I’m hardly squeezing her tiny wrists. Clove hisses and I notice how her wrists are turning a bright shade of red and there are a few vague bruises present.

“Please Cato, just give me some time.” Clove mumbles under her breath, inspecting her livid wrist.

“I already gave you time, Clove. I gave you one week.” I answer. “How much longer do you want?”

“I don’t know. Just give me some space! Is that too much for me to ask?”

“Clove…”

“I’ve heard enough, Cato.” Clove lowers her head. “I have to go.”

She starts walking away and I watch as she slips off my fingers for the second time. I had the chance to change her mind and I just let it float away into nothingness. I can’t believe I’m standing here frozen and isn’t doing anything to stop the girl from walking away. Wait. Who am I kidding? I can’t let her get away. I forcefully wake my feet up and take a few steps towards her to lessen the distance between us.

“There you go again, Clove!” I shout just as she’s about to get inside her car. “Why are you always running away, trying to escape our conversation?”

“Because there’s nothing more to say, Cato!” Clove shuts her car door irately.

“Why are you always pushing me away? I’m here, Clove. I’m here standing a few feet away from you trying to ask for your forgiveness and you won’t even dare to let me explain why I tried to kiss you in the first place.” I tell her. “Why is it that every time I show you care, you walk away?”

“I’m sorry but this is how I am. You can’t change me. If you can’t put up with me anymore, then leave! No one asked you to stay anyway.” With her voice so close to cracking due to her tears that she’s struggling to hold back, Clove answers.   

“No matter how hardheaded you are and how far you push me away I will always stay Clove…because I care! I care for you too much that sometimes the thought of it alone overwhelms me. I’ve never cared for someone like this before. And you need to accept that. You need to accept the fact that someone actually cares for you and sticks with you throughout. No one told me to stay with you but there’s a feeling in my heart that says I need to, I have to. I need to protect you, Clove.”

“I don’t need your protection. I can fend for myself.” Clove counters. “Your life doesn’t revolve around me. You have a life you may want to enjoy so fuck off and leave me alone!”

I walk closer to her and I’m glad she doesn’t inch away from me. “I don’t know what the reason may be but you need me, Clove. We both know it’s true. I’m sure of it and it’s just you trying to deny the fact that you really do need me.”

“I don’t need you.” She whines as a few tears escape from Clove's hazel eyes and I raise my thumb to wipe it away. The moment my skin comes in contact with her flawless one, she turns her head to the opposite direction. “I’ve learnt how to live without my parents and pretty sure I’m not in need of someone like you.”

Clove swats my hand away from her cheek and enters her car. I stand there watching as she reverses and drives away, leaving me alone to go over the events that transpired. I knew there’s something more about Clove and I just witnessed it happen.

* * *

“Hey! Yes, you. Can I have another bottle?”

Thresh, Finnick, Johanna, Fox and I decided to have a little fun tonight since Rue is having a sleepover with her friends on a school night. Of course her brother was against this but…it’s Rue. You can never win an argument with her. No matter what you do—get a lawyer, a judge, you’ll just end up as the defeated.

The four of us sat on the barstools as Fox dances with a random guy somewhere amongst the sea of people swaying and grinding on the dance floor. The first time she’s in our eyesight, she’s with a brunet and then the second time, she’s doing a drunken Macarena with a ginger.

“Slow down, Cato.” Thresh leans in to speak into my ear, as the music is too loud. “Keep in mind you’re still underage.”

“Who cares?” I scrunch my face as the bartender slides me another bottle of beer. “I’m just living my life. It’s not like Clove cares anyway. Like she said, I have a fucking life and I need to fucking enjoy it.”

I am so hammered I don’t even know what I’m saying.

“So this is about Clove, huh?”

I take another swig, deciding to ignore Thresh's query.

Thresh struggles to take the bottle of liquor from my hands and I clench it tighter. “Cato, you need to stop. You’ve had enough.” He scolds. Even though my vision is starting to get a tad blurry, the hardness and coldness of the elder boy’s gaze is very palpable.

“Come on. Don’t be a party pooper.” I slur, snatching the bottle from Thresh when he manages to take it from my grip. “Just two more.”

“No.” He snaps.

“No, let me—” I stop myself when I feel my stomach churning and the familiar taste of puke acid invades my taste buds. I shove my bottle on Johanna's chest and it spills a little on her shirt, which causes for her to let out a cuss. I hurry to the bathroom and I hear Thresh running after me.

When I reach the men’s restroom, I hustle to the closest open stall. I kneel in front of the toilet and hurl all the excess amount of alcohol in my body. I guess I lost Thresh among the massive amount of people because I didn’t hear him entering the bathroom after I did.

I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and flush the toilet. As I open the stall door, I stop dead in my tracks. Even though I’m highly intoxicated, I’m aware of the fact that I came alone in the bathroom. I didn’t hear the door opening nor did I see a closed stall when I came in and yet, someone is standing at the corner of the room. I turn my head in that direction and see no one. When I turn back to the mirror, the ghostly figure is crystal clear.

“Mom.” I whisper.

“Cato.” She answers; walking closer and feeling my face with her not surprisingly ice cold hand.

“Mom…h-how?” I ask as I take her hand in mine.

Her lips move but I can’t comprehend what she’s trying to imply.

“Danger…” Whispers mom.

“Danger?” I question. “Who’s in danger?”

My mom opens her mouth again but I hear no sound this time. Not even a whisper of some sort.

“Mom, what are you saying?”

“Clove…”

“Clove? What about her?” I inquire. “Mom, I don’t—”

“Cato!” Suddenly, Thresh comes bustling inside the bathroom with a look of worry in his features. “There you are. Are you okay?”

“I—”

“Come on, I’ll take you home.” He grabs me by my arms and literally drags me out of the bathroom.

“But…” I take another glance at the spot where I saw the ghost of my mom but she’s not there, all gone in a blink of an eye. Her words left me hanging and I need her to enlighten me more. “But I saw my mom. She was right there, at the corner, I talked to her, I touched her!”

“You’re drunk.” Thresh states. “Come on, let’s get the others and we’ll go home.”

“But…” I don’t bother to finish my sentence knowing that it’s useless. I know Thresh won’t believe me, but I know what I saw. I saw my mom and she’s warning me about something that concerns Clove.

I knew it. I knew that I have to protect Clove someday. Problem is…she won’t allow me.